Change is something that I am always afraid of. Around June last year, I was scared shitless about moving to Perth, Australia for about 1,5 years. Now that I have finished my study, I am going to leave Perth, and again, I am scared shitless. But everyone is afraid of changes to some extend. I, however, am terrified on the smallest change. Hair, for instance.
In my 20 years of lifetime, never have I ever have hair which length surpasses my shoulders. I always have it short, because I find long hair's such a hassle. Hell, I even had pixie haircut for several years during middle school. Last week, my hair reached my shoulders. I feel uneasy for reasons I can not comprehend other than technicality (not being able to feel the wind blowing to my neck, if that even make sense). I have to cut it, I think. And so I did.
Then, out of the blue, I crave for a change.
'But I just cut my hair. What kind of instant change I can make to enhance my appearance?'
This thought does not occur everyday, so if I want change, I better do something about it, ASAP. I better do the fucking change happened as soon as possible.
I was still positioned in a liftable chair at a hair salon, and next to me was a middle aged woman who was having her chunks of hair wrapped in aluminium foil, which from what I know means that she was having her hair highlighted. A thought came to mind.
'No, no. Having my hair dyed is a long-term commitment. Long-term commitment changes are big changes. Big changes make me shit my pants. And hair salon is probably the last place I want to be when I have to experience an occurrence of having shit in my underpants.'
The next moment is the 5 seconds where I felt like a complete genius to myself.
Having fringe means cutting my hair, which I never have a problem to begin with. And it's only a little chunk of my hair that is getting cut. Doubled my excitement!
Also, fringes always intrigue me. It may works like a curtain to the face and slightly hides features of a face, yet at the same time it creates structure and enhances some other facial features. Fringes also scream mystery to me. People with fringes always had me driven with curiosity. It's like they have a dirty secret that they don't want you to find out, but they hinted that they do anyways.
Think of Jenny from the movie An Education, Mia Wallace from Pulp Fiction, or the latest one, Minnie Goetze from The Diary of a Teenage Girl. They somehow share the same traits; goofy but mysterious, playful but witty. They also happen to share the same hairstyle; bobbed haircut (long or short) with fringes.
All the cool people I look up to in real life rock fringes; Karen O, Felicity Jones, my mom when she was 17 (I believe she’d still be rocking fringes now despite being 51). Even George Harrison had fringes some time in his life as a Beatle and he never looked cooler.
Still at the hair salon, I could not think of a bad thing about fringe. So I asked the hairdresser to also cut my bangs.
As she prepared her hair scissors, I jumped out of my chair and immediately told her to forget my earlier request and just finished the whole haircutting altogether. As expected of me, I was scared shitless.
Changes can wait, right? I should focus on the present, my present. Like, get my shit together and whatnot. I will decide of what changes should I go through. Just, not now.. I guess?
When I got back home, I rediscovered hair clip-on I bought in Priceline. I am so glad this thing was invented. Now, whenever I want a change, I will just pin this on my hair and voila, I am my alter ego, who I have yet to decide a cool, quirky name of.
smiling is so 2015. pouting, on the other hand...
What are your thoughts on bangs? And what kind of changes do you like to do to your hair?